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February 23, 2006
The road ahead
Richard's birthday gave me pause to think about where I'm at in life. These days I'm basically content, which is certainly a luxury and a blessing given the past few years of location disharmony. Several friends and acquaintances have either just given birth or are expecting, and I've done a lot of hard thinking in that area. Biological clock be damned, but I think I'd like to wait a bit before getting back on the baby train. Not forever, but probably at least the rest of this year. I could say that I wanted to be sure that Richard was ready, but really, I want to be sure that I'm ready.
Kids have always been an ambivalent point for me. Although I love animals and do a fairly good job with the menagerie, human babies have never made my heartstrings flutter. Heather coming along at the point she did in my youth did not help matters. At 10 and almost 11, I was fully cognizant of what a messy, uncomfortable, tiring, and generally icky thing that pregnancy and birth are. I was spared the actual birth, but I was subjected to Lamaze classes and all the accompanying literature. One word comes to mind: Ew. It didn't help that every one of the other couples in my parents Lamaze class were first timers -- they were all nauseatingly gungho about the miracle of life and the joy and beauty that only 14 hours of drug-free labor could bring. It was amusing seeing the group a few months later after the blessed event -- all still espousing how wonderful it was, but now in the way that you tell a child, "No, the shot won't hurt at all."
So, while I do wonder what Richard and I would be like as parents, I'm still not quite ready to find out :) I'd like to get our work lives settled, and into a house, and have some roots down before getting into all of that.
Posted by jodikins at February 23, 2006 1:01 AM